Over the last couple of weeks, I started feeling super drained. I don’t really know how to explain it except for I was busy trying. I was trying to align God’s plan to my timetable. I was trying to fix everything around me. I was trying to be encouraging to those near me. I was trying to do all the right things.
But all this effort in trying, left me e x h a u s t e d.
In all honesty, my heart didn’t really want to talk to God and there wasn’t really a reason.
I didn’t know what to pray or what to lay before Him.
I had no words.
In the midst of my own efforts of trying super hard, God reminded me of the truth He spoke to me a few years back.
My church has been going through Genesis and we recently studied through chapter 14. Imagine this with me: There’s a lot of war. Different kings were trying to take over other kings with more power. Every time these lesser kings tried to conquer the powerful kings, they always lost. It never worked in the underdog’s favor. Then Abram’s nephew, Lot, was captured by these powerful kings. Abram along with 318 men decided they were going to go up against the most powerful kings. Needless to say, Abram and his 318 men were the underdogs.
Guess what happened next?
They defeated the most powerful kings. And afterward, this priest greeted Abram and his men along their way back; and the priest reminded the men that God was the one who defeated those powerful kings.
It was in that simple moment at church, reading and listening to this story of God’s protection and provision, that the Holy Spirit started reminding me God is in control–not me. It is God who perfectly times out the events in my life. It is God who works miracles. It is God who fixes everything around me. It is God who is the source of all encouragement. It is God who wins the war in my heart. It is God who protects me and comforts me.
It is God–not me.
All this effort in trying to be whatever I thought I needed to be was n e v e r going to work because it’s not about me. It’s about God. It’s not about what I can do, but rather what God can do.
In Genesis 14, it wasn’t Abram and the 318 men going up against the most powerful kings; it was God. God defeated the enemy. That’s why verses 19 and 20 God is praised: “Blessed be Abram by God Most High, Possessor of heaven and earth; and blessed be God Most High, who has delivered your enemies into your hand!”
God delivered Abram from his enemies and God has and continues to deliver me from my enemies. And here lately, I have been my biggest enemy (anyone else ever feel this way?). I needed God to deliver me from myself and the lies I was believing.
I believed I was the one in control and the one doing everything. This is what was making me exhausted. The idea that I could do all things was and still is a lie I believed.
I am not the one that can do all things. God is.
God has so graciously reminded me of the truth that He has done it all. He did it all on the cross thousands of years ago. God ultimately delivered me from my own sin by sending Jesus to die for me. All I need to do, is believe in Him.
Did yah catch that?
The only thing I need to do (the only thing you need to do), is believe in Him.
God isn’t asking for my effort. God isn’t asking for my ability to do something. God isn’t asking for encouragement. God isn’t asking for my help. God isn’t asking me to deliver myself from my sin.
NO! Those are all lies.
Instead, He wants me to believe in Him. He wants Y O U to believe in Him, in His Power, in his Deliverance (even if His deliverance is from the lies we believe).
Through God reminding me of this amazing story of God’s deliverance, I have stopped trying so hard. I have rested in His presence and believed Him at His word.
God’s got this!
God’s got me.
God’s got you!
This isn’t easy. I literally still fail at this!
B U T
I know God is holding everything in heaven and on earth together; therefore, I can stop trying.